Say It Like You Mean It (And Like You Care)

Let’s be honest—most feedback either:

• Feels like a passive-aggressive jab

• Or is so sugarcoated you can’t even tell what went wrong

Millennials want honest, actionable feedback—but only if it comes from someone who genuinely gives a damn.

That’s where Radical Candor comes in.

Coined by Kim Scott (ex-Google, ex-Apple), this concept is as real as it gets.

It’s not just about being “nice” or “direct”—it’s about combining both in a way that makes people better without breaking trust.

The Core Formula:

1. Care Personally
→ Build trust. Show empathy. Know your people.

2. Challenge Directly
→ Say the hard thing. Be clear. Don't avoid discomfort.

Most People Only Do One of These Well:

Let’s break it down:

• Radical Candor (✅):
  “You’re capable of more—this version feels safe. Let’s try something bolder.”

• Ruinous Empathy (😬):
  “It’s fine!” (even though it’s… definitely not fine)

• Obnoxious Aggression (😡):
  “This isn’t good.” No context. No care.

• Manipulative Insincerity (🙃):
  Fake nice. Avoids the truth. Talks behind your back later.

Real-Life Example:

A creative director gives a junior designer feedback:

The result? The designer leveled up. They felt seen and challenged. Not torn down.

That’s Radical Candor in action.

Pro Tips to Practice It:

• Don’t wait for formal reviews—give feedback in real-time.

• When in doubt: clarity > comfort.

• Ask for feedback before you give it—model what good looks like.

• If it feels slightly uncomfortable to say, you’re probably doing it right.

• Always connect feedback to the bigger goal—not the person’s identity.

TL;DR:

Your team doesn’t need a boss.

They need a coach who cares enough to challenge them.

So don’t sugarcoat. But don’t be a jerk either.

Give feedback like you're mentoring your little sibling—direct, honest, and rooted in belief.